Milestone Celebrations

This past Saturday, my youngest son got married. In May my oldest granddaughter will graduate from college, and my middle granddaughter will graduate from high school. My oldest grandson will turn 21, and my youngest grandson will be headed to kindergarten. In July, my entire family will convene in Detroit for our family reunion, and in August, my husband and I will celebrate 45 years of marriage. All of these events are what people call major milestones. All of these events require some form of celebration because they are important life experiences. Graduations, the birth of a child, birthdays, winning playoffs, and retirements are all good reasons to celebrate. By definition, they are milestones in a person’s life (“an action or event marking a significant change or stage in development” Webster). Yet, some days it feels like a major milestone just to get out of bed. (Perhaps that just me.)

When you become a certain age, you began to count small victories as great milestones. Every day that my 91-year-old mom gets up and is physically and mentally able to care for herself, we take a victory lap. Every day that I conquer depression and function as a wife, daughter, teacher, author and friend is a day to celebrate in song. (Singing and music is my muse.) What may seem minor to others may be great events in your eyes. Things like overcoming negative self-talk and maintaining peace in the midst of other people’s chaos calls for a celebration. Being able to stay on budget and plan a vacation or getting a good report from the doctor can be a personal milestone. The size of the celebration may not warrant lots of party hoopla, but these events are worthy of a festive observance. You can celebrate with a glass of wine (my favorite standby) or have lunch with a friend. You can plan a special date night or make a positive social media post. Another favorite of mine is to journal my gratitude, listen to my favorite playlist, or get dressed up and take myself out on the town.

So what if you didn’t start a new job or get that promotion, you are still worth celebrating. So, you lost five pounds instead of 15, that’s a step in the right direction, congratulate yourself. The small wins in life are just as important as the huge milestones. Acknowledge the pebbles that lead to the stones. Short-term goals lead to accomplishing long-term goals. You are still on planet earth; you made it through a pandemic, it’s time to celebrate. If you are still above water in these inflationary times, that’s quite an accomplishment. If you can count five people who truly love and care for you, that’s extraordinary. If you have finally seen one of your goals come to fruition, celebrate. If you have peace in your soul and contentment in your heart, I’d say that deserves special recognition.

Small milestones (pebbles) may not lead to bigger milestones (mountains), but when you acknowledge the small things, it will be harder for disappointment to bring you down. Thoughts like I didn’t hit a home run, but I made it to second base is a lot different from I’m not very good at baseball. Things didn’t go the way I planned them today, but tomorrow is a new day, and I’m going to give it all I’ve got is a different thought process from I never win, nothing ever goes my way. I haven’t finished my latest book, but I finished this blog, cheers to me! I’m going to sit on the front porch with a glass of wine, the novel I’m reading, and enjoy the moment. The birds will sing. The chipmunks will scatter, and I will be happy that I accomplished this small thing today.

What little pebbles have you overlooked? Did you control your temper today? Did you release your anxieties through mindfulness exercises? Did you enjoy a garden salad and skip the decadent chocolate cake? Did you have a communication breakthrough with your wayward child or your significant other? Did someone tell you how much they love you? Did you get through rush hour without an accident or crisis? Did you find some old pictures that brought sweet memories and made you smile? What can you find to celebrate today? Trust me, there’s always a reason to be grateful, and there’s always a reason to celebrate.

Slow down! Reflect! Be grateful! Celebrate life.

Living in Joy

Okay, I’ll admit the title is a play on words, but I didn’t want to say “enjoy living” because I want to talk about more than just enjoying living. I want to talk about finding joy in living. One of my favorite songs is: “Golden” sang by Jill Scott. The hook says, “I’m livin’ my life like it’s golden, golden, golden . . .” That’s what I’m talking about. Living life like it is a precious gift; creating memorable moments and treasuring valuable relationships -living in joy.

Perhaps you are thinking that’s a crazy idea considering our “new normal” during this pandemic, but that makes it more important than ever as far as I’m concerned. If the Corona-virus has taught me anything, it’s that life is way to fragile. Since that’s true, why live with regrets. Why miss opportunities to live in joy. I’m surprised at the little things that can bring joy into our lives and the lives of the people we love even in the midst of crisis.

The other day, my granddaughter had a really bad day at work. I could tell she had been crying even before she shared the events of her day with me. The next day she came into my room an hour before it was time for her to leave for work. She said, “I want to quit! I don’t want to go!” I encouraged her to go and to keep her own goals in mind in spite of how other people behave. As soon as she walked out of the door, I sent her a meme of Squidward (a Sponge Bob character, I spend a lot of time with kids) taking a shower in money followed by a Waynan Brothers meme that said, “Mo’ Money.” I could picture her laughing. She was probably surprised I knew how to send a meme in the first place. When she came home I asked her if she needed a few more memes. She laughed and said, “Nana, you’re so extra!” (I think that’s slang for being great lol.) Today, I sent her a Wonder Women meme and told her how proud of her I am. This was a little thing that brought us both joy.

While you are sheltering in, you can still live in joy. My husband brought me breakfast one morning. It was one slice of bacon and one teaspoon of scrambled eggs. He presented it to me like it was a gourmet meal. His giggles turned into us both laughing, so I returned the favor the next day with one mini sausage and one very small piece of omelet.

Today, I sent several friends songs from my YouTube playlist with a message of love and encouragement. I wrote a poem (the beginning of a new collection) even though it’s really hard for me to write at home. Yet, it was very satisfying. My mom and I prayed together and watched a video bible study together. Today she called all her church friends just to see how they were doing. She was on the phone for hours and I could hear her laughing which also made me smile. What are the things you can do to find and share joy?

Here’s a few old-fashioned things you can do even if you live alone. Give yourself a spa night – a warm bath, a glass of wine, a scented candle. Follow that with painting your nails or just doing a manicure/pedicure. Draw a hop scotch on the sidewalk or in the street for the neighborhood kids. Plant a flower or some vegetables. (You can order seeds, soil, and pots on-line at very low cost.) Cook your favorite meal and serve it on your best china. Call a family member and share a story that’s old and hilarious. Play basketball with your dirty clothes by throwing them in the washer from five or six feet away. (Social distancing my laundry, now that’s a plan.) Get the popcorn, turn the lights out and watch your favorite movie. Add whatever makes you smile to this list. Be creative!

I choose to live in joy rather than fear. I can’t do anything about the Corona-virus and all its mandates. I can choose my attitude, my disposition, and my outlook. I can be grateful that I’m still alive. I can use my gifts, my talents, and my time to bring joy to myself and others by any means necessary – and it is necessary because life is valuable. Try living your life like it’s golden for two weeks, then send me a comment about your experiences. Together, we may come up with more ways to live in joy.

Golden
amazon.com

I Choose Joy: The Daily Gratitude Practice That Will Transform Your Life
The Daily Gratitude Practice: Record your gratitude for ten things in your life. Write down three goals. Commit to personal and professional growth. amazon.com